I became frustrated about something. In my frustration, I said things, that I wish I had not said to people I did not mean to hurt. I feel I 'marred' my testimony to them, 'if I ever had one in the first place' and feel bad about it.
I feel like a failure, for this is not the first time this has happened. A failure, as a person, a friend and as a witness for Christ.
I told myself, I should just stay away from people and then I would not take a chance of doing that again. I am a loner, anyway, so I should just stay home and never leave the house.
But, I cannot, for I like to go to church, I need to shop and want to go see my relatives and friends.
What do I do?
I sat to read my Bible and turned to Psalms, reading my highlighted portions and it reminded me of my refuge and strength. No matter what happens in my life, God is there for me.
But, I try to let Him lead in my life, so, why did He let me say those things and act the way I did? I don't know why. However, I have to go on from today and continue to trust Him and not be afraid. And if I let it keep me from people, then the enemy has won! I do not want that to happen.
I do not say this for people to 'pat me on the back', etc. I say it so others can be helped in a similar situation, my dear friends in the Lord. God bless you.
2 Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.
4 Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight:
10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
11 Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.
12 Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit.
13 Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee.
17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.
17 Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray, and cry aloud: and he shall hear my voice.
3 What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
4 In God I will praise his word, in God I have put my trust; I will not fear what flesh can do unto me.
9 When I cry unto thee, then shall mine enemies turn back: this I know; for God is for me.
10 In God will I praise his word: in the LORD will I praise his word.
11 In God have I put my trust: I will not be afraid what man can do unto me.
1Be merciful unto me, O God, be merciful unto me: for my soul trusteth in thee: yea, in the shadow of thy wings will I make my refuge, until these calamities be overpast.
2 I will cry unto God most high; unto God that performeth all things for me.
1 Hear my cry, O God; attend unto my prayer.
2 From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
3 For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy.
4 I will abide in thy tabernacle for ever: I will trust in the covert of thy wings.
1 Truly my soul waiteth upon God: from him cometh my salvation.
2 He only is my rock and my salvation; he is my defence; I shall not be greatly moved.
3 How long will ye imagine mischief against a man? ye shall be slain all of you: as a bowing wall shall ye be, and as a tottering fence.
4 They only consult to cast him down from his excellency: they delight in lies: they bless with their mouth, but they curse inwardly.
5 My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.
6 He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved.
7 In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.
8 ¶ Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us.